Leftover Women

Feb 17, 2018

Book review

Leftover in China is a book that looks at the growing trend of unmarried, highly educated women. China calls them “sheng nu”, leftover women.

I recognize that as a man, I cannot testify to experiencing this for myself so let’s get that out of the way. I also recognize that I’m an outsider to the mainland, but then again so is the author.

With all that being said this is an okay book that most deeply focuses on a very specific group of people - college educated urban elite women with dating issues. I can only believe this is a trend because the author’s friends attest to it.

The thesis I took away from this book is that women are ascendant in Asia yet their self-fulfillment is repressed by the traditional cultures. As my sister said about one such woman, “She don’t need no man”.

The book’s perspective is really quite tight. The author interviews mostly successful, globe-trotting, well-educated women in the city. Many of whom own homes and businesses of their own. This seems pretty representative of her social cohort. I am not sure how representative it is of China in general. Many of the people come from Beijing and Shanghai - together representing 50 million people but just 4% of the population. Are these women truly the future engine for the second largest economy in the world?

Where are the men? I can recall just a handful of interviews with the men themselves. The intro briefly goes into a story of one such guy in a rural area but that’s the only such in the book. I’d like to have seen why they and their families feel uncomfortable dating women who are so successful. Otherwise, the only times I hear about men is through second-hand accounts of bad dates. For example, one guy was rejected because while he looked great on paper but when they first traveled together, he brought a teddy bear with him. I don’t want to be glib but hasn’t everyone been out on a date with someone weird?

This book has a sensationalist feel to it: Look at how Asia treats its women, the horror! There are long chapters that focus on cultural phenomenon such as marriages between gay guys and lesbian women. I find that awkward to deal with because as much as I like to learn more and am interested in the topic, I found this way of handling needless.

I am still looking for a good book on this topic. I’ll write about it when I find it.