Figuring out what now

Nov 21, 2017

When the mind races too fast

I have not been sleeping well, waking up at 3 AM repeatedly over and over again. I am not sure what to do about it. I go to sleep at a decent hour, about 11 PM or so, but find myself waking up at 3 AM. More troublingly, I find myself waking just an hour later too - about 12:30 AM. Though afterwards I am able to sleep.

It feels like a lottery. Some times I might wake up at about 5 AM and that feels great. But then I wake up at 3 AM with my brain running at 60 mph. Sometimes I indulge what my brain wants to do - just work.

The problem is that I do not have work for it to do. Right now I am in between coding projects, with HackerJobs being the most frustrating thing that I have ever worked on. I can’t write for crap due to my wrist issues - and I am not sure what else I can do.

I try to give some sort of closure for the posts that I post to this blog, but right now I am feeling a bit down in the dumps. When I have found myself in complicated situations in life and that surfaces in my sleep, I cut and cut to try to simplify things. I sell problematic stocks in my portfolio. I delete side projects that I was working on. I start just shipping things so that I can get them out of my head.

But this one seems more difficult to crack.